Last Thursday about 3/4 of the way through the 2 hour run, I over taxed my right calf muscles and suffered some local damage as a result. At the time I was running relatively fast and was changing my stride to increase the amount of push-off. It was a good idea but not a good time as it was quite sore by the time I arrived home. I put some Arnica gel on it which I believe accelerates the healing process and hoped it would recover.
So Friday I rested because I could still feel it and on Saturday I gave in to the desire to run up on the Downs in the glorious sunshine we are so fortunate to have right now. However after an hour it started to hurt again so I cut the run short.
Next day we had planned to run to Bath and back in honour of the anniversary of Sri Chinmoy’s arrival in the West, but it was clear to me it wasnt going to happen. I still wanted to do a little though- a token of my wish and I decided I would run for another hour. Maybe it wasn’t the wisest thing to do and yet as I returned home, I had a powerful feeling of unfulfillment. Then it was clear to me I had to let the injury heal – however long it takes because otherwise this situation will just drag on and on.
A few days earlier I had gone out for a run and was struck by the feeling that it seemed absolutely ages since I had run last. It seemed like it was so long ago that I couldn’t remember when it was when in fact it had just been the previous day.
Of course I was attached to my running. I am reading a book called “I Am That” by Sri Nisargadatta and I read a few pages everyday. This morning’s chapter finished with the following paragraph.
“Attachment destroys courage. The giver is always ready to give. The taker is absent. Freedom means letting go. People just do not care to let go everything.They do not know that the finite is the price of the infinite, as death is the price of immortality. Spiritual maturity lies in the readiness to let go everything. The giving up is the first step. But the real giving up is in realizing that there is nothing to give up, for nothing is your own. It is like deep sleep – you do not give up your bed when you fall asleep – you just forget it.”
Sri Nisargadatta
And then a Sri Chinmoy aphorism from 77,000 Service-Trees: 45,022
Happiness depends
Only on self-giving
And not on anything else.